Monday Mania

Grocery shopping for the week is done. Whew. 2 1/2 hours in one store with a tired baby girl, a hungry and  menstruating momma, and finally a check out clerk who was an angel in disguise! I get so nervous and worked up when it is my time to head to the check-out line. You know it. We all hate to be behind that person in line who is taking for.ev.er with the coupons and crap. I can only imagine what people are saying in their neighborhoods (their minds) about me. Really. It doesn't matter. We all wait our turn. I pep talk my self through it and I come out on the other side just fine. Okay, so I have hugely sweaty pits and my heart is racing but I have crossed that finish line once again. Today's cart was piled just about as high as O's head as she sat perched upon her cart cover, feet dangling and fingers busily shoveling happy snacks in to her pie hole. It is finished. For this week at least. I did have a slew of coupons and a ton of things that needed to be price-matched. I have a pretty good system worked out - my cra.zy mind is good for some things!

Upon arriving home - I carried my 26lb sack 'o potatoes to her crib and lay her down to continue her beauty sleep. I swear she gets more beautiful each day.
She typically falls to sleep after grocery shopping, as soon as I pull out of the parking spot.
She teeters between 1 and 2 naps a day still, in this 15th month (+9 in the womb) of life for her.
Who knew riding around in the cart and munching for a few hours could tucker one out so much?
She slept and I blessed the kitchen, cleaned out the fridge and tidied up a bit after unloading and putting away more bags of "stuff" than should be allowed.

Thank you Lord for your providence for our family this week.

We did manage to pick up one item that was not food related. 

O is obsessed with jewelry.
She loves to wear my bracelets, necklaces, rosaries, etc.
We found some plastic, flower-shaped and brightly colored bracelets just for her.
8 of them.
All on one arm.
All over the floor.
Split between both arms.
All over the floor again.
Clanking them together.
One on each arm.
 It was a busy time for both of us, but what enjoyment $0.97 worth of plastic gave us!

These are a few of our favorite things from today. O can't stop eating her gf pretzels.
The Sharkies are all natural and gf gummy snacks. I cut them in half, but she likes to swallow them just that way. I am working with her on chewing (ok, gumming) them. She has 3 1/2 teeth but they are all up front yet.
The teensy rubber duck was her best friend this morning - she chewed all over it and carried it just about everywhere. The nurse at her well visit gave it to her right  before he stuck the needle in her leg for one immunization. YIKES! It hurts me to watch her get that.
I'm grateful my doctor is patient and understanding with me as I exercise my right to be informed and decisive about immunizations for my child. It's a touchy subject.

 Laughing are you? Go ahead, you have probably experienced this too. I saw her start spinning the roll and was trying to get ready for work, so I let her finish. Her delight was much more worth it than my stopping her. The oohs and ahhhs and giggles were priceless and I got my makeup on without her grabbing at all my stuff on the counter while I do it.

Muffin tops. 

I like the food ones that actually come off the top of a muffin. 

I don't so much care for the one in my mid-section these days. 

Things I hope to do soon, ok- within a month most likely . . . 

-figure out how to take the date off the pictures, I feel like a dork showing the pics with it

-figure out how to change/enhance the pics I post

-send out thank you cards to my sisters-in-law who brought O gifts a few weeks ago

-that one thing that I keep remembering to do when I don't have the opportunity to do it and now I can't remember what the hell that stinkin thing is

-sit for an undisturbed few hours and learn how to use my new tablet and it's features

-order a new product for curly hair, Moisture Block, it's supposed to be amazing

-purchase some fun, new summer shoes

-sleep

-pray

-pick up the prescription that is waiting for me at Walgreens - for like 5 days now

-use the fresh basil I have in the fridge to make pesto - better get on that, fresh doesn't stay forever

Things I wish . . . 

*I could remember the things that earlier today I wanted to remember to put in this here blog - damn

*some people were easier to talk to

*that decisions were easier to make - especially decorating ones, meal planning ones

*that my husband was next to me when I sleep

*we could take all the $1' s from the various lotteries and do something remarkable with all that moola - feed the hungry - help the poor - shelter the homeless - give to those that need it

*that I had a washboard or a 6-pack instead of a muffin top

*that swimsuit season wasn't just around the corner - would it look too strange if I wore a full body wetsuit with a few pairs of spanks under it to the pool with O? C'mon, don't tell me no one else has wondered this!

*the person who is homeless for the first time tonight can have some peace and not lose hope

Brief Untitled Post

How is today so different than yesterday? Because I am a wohman and I have hormones. Enough said, I suppose. How is this year so different from the year before and so on? Why, what made me tick then, doesn't now? Life happening on life's terms, the will of my God, my openness to His will or the struggle with my own perhaps? Took me years to understand that different does not equal bad. Change is/can be good. O's two messy diapers early were changed and that was an instant GREAT! 

Something is off with me. It must be. I have a beautiful family, an abundant career, amazing friends and people in my life and yet today, I want a day off from it all. Completely. a.day.off. 

Perhaps with the salon change, the experience that lead up to it and a few other thousand details happening in my life these days I might have chosen to pass on the current diaper study I am partaking in. Nope, I'm just insane. The lure of "free" money and "free" diapers swept my heart up right from the word FREE. It's not a ton of work, just more work on an already overtime-d/overworked human doing being. Oy vey. I will choose to be grateful, IknowIcanIknowIcanIknowIcanIknowIcan.

Chicken enchilada ingredients are split between the fridge and the kitchen counter. Let's hope they find a way to come together tonight to make a delicious dinner . . . along with some rice and veggies.

Part of the current exhaustion may also be due to the cup filling this week. No, not a red solo cup filled with an amazing adult beverage. Rather, the cup of blessing. Literally felt like I was running around to find new cups to catch the overflowing blessings from the original cup. I'll take that as a sign of I am right where I am supposed to be. Recently a friend gave me a small angel figurine. She is standing with her arms outstretched and her back arched a tiny bit. Sort of in a great morning stretch as I shake off the sleepies, but also in a stance of just basking in the Son. I love it. I need to meditate on that stance.

Things I am excited about today . . . 

clean laundry in the making

homemade gf cinnamon rolls 

chocolate sauce to die for, recipe 

my pedicure 

setting the salon studio up 

the thought of getting to go to Target for a few things (absolute fav store)

seeing O in a minute, she is waking up. 

O's bed head

to see how the day finishes out

one more day done on the diaper study

rest

Lessons, Lessens, oooh Lemon Bars!

School of ROCK, LIFE. I was not a fan of hearing that "we never stop learning", "there is always something to learn from a situation", "let life be your teacher" . . . on and on. I wanted (felt the pressure) simply to arrive. To be at the destination. To not be "on the journey" any longer. Thinking that the "walk, path, work, learning" never ceased exhausted me. My personality tends to be a teensy bit overly responsible already and so this made the thought of "life-long" even more long and arduous. Hmmm. Haven't used that word in a while. I feel slightly smarter.

I see the wisdom in this, today. I can shake off that feeling of needing to arrive, to be done, to be everything right now - and just enjoy the moment. Be excited for the change of learning, not be threatened by the thought of growing in learning or sharing what I have learned with others. I used to seek advice on just about everything, not making decisions on my own, consciously at least. Today it's not so much advice that I seek, but the experience of others. Ok, so I don't want to re-invent the wheel as they say. I also think people's experience can be a great teacher for me, though sometimes not. I love to know how people handle things, decide things, choose things and work things out. People tic and it interests me.

So many lessons. These past few years, I have been learning a lot. Throwing a few temper tantrums somewhere in there, but really learning and growing a lot. New career. Marriage. Mommyhood. Some losses, and some other small gains mixed in there too. I love my new career - it was a steep uphill climb for the year I made the change but the view from the top of that climb is miraculous! Marriage. So many things have been learned in such a short time. Some say spouses are like sandpaper - they will rub the yucky stuff away and help reveal the good and the holy within you. Sounds harsh but I can understand. I love my DH and continually know we were brought together because of a greater purpose in God's tender heart. I have learned a lot about myself, about what love really is, and about how selfish a person I have been and can be. I have learned that I have a great capacity to love and a great need to be loved intimately. I have learned that my heart feels more full when I keep God in the center of my marriage and all that I do. I have learned how important it is for my DH and I to pray together, and to pray with our little one. I have also learned that I can forgive, our 80 lb-tenderhearted pitbull often, for all his barking and barreling us over.

Lessens. Spring cleaning, getting rid, shedding. Call it what it is. I have been working to clear out clothing, shoes, accessories, papers, junk, food, situations. Some are worn out, some are past the expiration date, some are toxic at this point (situations included here), and some are just not needed or desired any longer. Oh, and some just don't fit! Perhaps a girlfriend party is in order? We could all bring the items that still have some life to them and swap? Hmmm. May have to put some thought and action into this.

Ooooh. I forgot we have leftover lemon bars in the fridge. Breakfast, here I come!
It was a cra.zy day yesterday as Monday's often are.
Up at 5, grocery list and menu for the week done, coupons clipped and 1 cup of java in my veins
6 - O woke up full of happy energy
girly getting ready time
grocery shopping
Sally Beauty supply shopping
phone calls made
emails checked
clients scheduled
pedicure (love the artwork. Wish I could have understood that she was telling me, each item she was offering was an additional "5dollah". By the time I got to the register the total was absurd. I gently argued my point and left paying what was originally told to me in an almost accent-less voice. Wont' be returning)
one more grocery store - thought I had an e-coupon loaded. Drat
Dinner fed to O, DH awoke from his beauty sleep
Off we went to Fiesta Mall in search of an Android Tablet
Met the college kid from Craig's list selling the above mentioned tablet, bought it
Finished the yummy mall pretzels for dinner
645pm, I crawled into bed not to awake until today at 430 am to a starving little girl. Milk given and she sleeps again. I have been getting "stuff" done. I love this time to myself. I love my coffee and I'm really gonna love that lemon bar

Sheer Delight, Abundant Blessings

I'm just saying. . . professional photographer I am not.

The Omahaians arrived Friday night and we caught up with them Saturday at Organ Stop Pizza. A place where fun is had by all. Even the really freaky young man, dressed in theatrical clothing, dancing and acting out to the music in the main aisle. Couldn't figure out if he was a worker or just someone who had a few cards missing in the deck. Don't we all have a few cards missing some days though? I do. O was mesmerized by the lights, moving objects and music the whole time we were there. The cousins thoroughly enjoyed themselves too, taking pics and video and requesting a ton of songs from the magical organ player.

Saturday came, stayed, stayed some more and then went. A very long day. Clients were great, co-workers were amazing. Felt watched all day,
like.
a.
hawk.
Weirdness. In the watching, I swear daggers were being thrown at me several times from the eyes of the watcher. Uncomfortable. Good thing my God is bigger than that and he allowed me to be as well. The holes I felt in my "self" by the end of the day were quickly filled up with love and tenderness as I embraced time with my Omaha family. Eating a gf pizza for dinner before hand too, helped. Yummy.

Eatn chips and playin Yatzee

More time and sheer delight with the Omaha clan today. O and I went over to see them this morning while DH slept his night/day sleep. God bless his body clock. Ahhhhhh - to be filled up and refueled was a true gift. One niece, G was all over O showing her things, telling her things and trying her darndest to have O do as she wanted. Totally cute.And there was O, being her own teeny person and picking up rotten lemons and rocks in the backyard.
Dora the Explorer.

The fountain of youth?

My goddaugher, T, was there for bit too before the exciting offer of swimming came about and then she was off. She has matured so beautifully. She also had a much more stylish handbag than I do. What's up with that. I need to get on that! A very gifted artist, she gave me a beautiful print of ballet shoes she sketched. Incredible. I draw stick figures and hearts really well.

7 kids and 6 adults and a ton of food!

Who knew an air mattress could be so much fun.

O was working up such a sweat playing and bouncing,
we didn't put her jammas on until after. Hence the
tanktop and diaper.

Moms always make things better. Meals, laundry,
naps, etc. I love my mom. I am grateful for the change in our relationship since I am now a mom too. A different depth, understanding and level of love. Surprising but I am grateful. Delicious dinner and a plethora of laughter that erupted from stories and the actions of all the teeny people playing together. Heartwarming.





















Today in my life, most days I should say, God feels like a blessing to me. Some days the struggle is very present with my perception of that abstract power/creator. I have been stepping outside my life a bit to watch the many ways He is orchestrating things, allowing opportunity, guiding me in his perfect will for me and blessing me beyond my wildest dreams. Now that's a higher power! I am moved to tears as I realize all of this and work to receive it. Receiving shouldn't be work, that seems conflicting. Hmmmm. Anyway, today I am mucho grateful. He most certainly showed up with all the events of the weekend past, protected me and has been raining opportunity and blessing down on my. Feel like I need a lifejacket from all the "rain". Thank you.

Catching up on what is to be done soon . . .
menu for the week
grocery list and coupons ready
shop for android tablet
shop for final products
paint toenails
clip O's fingernails



A few fun pics from the early weekend:

Cousin S reading a story to O, darn cute!

Cousin A reading in a Shakespearean voice to O. Hilarious. 

A former student, now a high schooler. Prom! I LOVE updo's!

Word 6. Bruised. More Lemon Bars & lemonade.

Oh yes. Or should I say "no". My sweet daughter has arrived at word #6. No. She sounds a bit like Mork from Mork & Mindy, says something that sounds like nanno and then just no. Perhaps trying to repeat "no-no"? I laugh inside and tell myself to not react 'cuz she isn't meaning it how I think she means it.
Yet.
The day will come.

I made lemon bars and lemonade today. I was given a huge bagful. As I was zesting the lemons and squeezing the juice out (which was no small feat mind you, I have 2 large cuts on two different fingers, insert "awwww" here). Anywho, as I was doing those tasks I was thinking back to my morning today and how a painful experience was already transforming me like I was taking these sour lemons and hopefully turning them into deliciousness. The bars turned out yummy, nice and lemoney. The lemonade. Well that's another story. My husband ended up doctoring it up with a ton more sugar than I used and it turned out great. I got a good laugh out of my lemonade incompetence.  It was a painful experience this morning. Still feel a tinge bruised by it. Ever been with people who come unglued and hurl really mean things at you verbally? Where your personhood/spirit is attacked? I know, probably "not for long" you're saying to yourself. It felt like 5 hours but was more like 5 min. Not looking for pity in this, just gettin it out. Not trying to sound like a self help book either - there may be a few too many of those on the bookstore shelves already. Here is what I gained from the experience today - to some it may be common sense but we have all grown up differently and have varied backgrounds.

• Just because someone thinks something about me does not mean it is true.
• Others do not have to agree or even understand my decisions/choices. They are mine.
• At the end of the day, I will do what is best for myself and my family.
• Prayer works, really works!
• I am very blessed.

(stepping of soap box)

I have a blessing book. A good friend, I love you CM, told me about it years ago. I have jotted down different situations/circumstances where I was worried, afraid, confused or utterly stupified and God pulled through for me. I look at this every once in a while to pray in gratitude but also to remember that my God has not turned his back on me, He has shown up each time I am in need. Really, He is always there. I am the one who turns away, darn human will. I can look in that book and see miracles. Things I thought that looked horrible turning out wonderfully, how I was protected from something, or how a new opportunity came up. Meeting my husband is in that book. Thanks FG, my brother-in-law, who was instrumental with his wife in my meeting my DH. Today will go in the book. God totally came through for me. 

I ask for peace, God. Peace for those who are in turmoil. Whatever the situation. Whatever their needs. Life-giving, life-altering  peace. For me as well, that I may awake refreshed and prepared to meet the day tomorrow with joy and that life-altering peace. Thank you for bringing the Omahaians here safely! 24 hours in a Honda Pilot with 6 kids and two adults. Whew!

Garbage Disposals, Keith Hernandez & News

Numero Uno. I hate Garbage disposals. Well, I love what they do but I hate them. Every stinkin time I go near it I flashback to that one movie (The Godfather?) where one guy is holding another guy's hand down in there and he turns it on. Yuck. It is just a movie, just Hollywood, but it stuck with me. A similar fear of swimming pool drains creeps up on me when I go swimming. Silly. Again, some movie I saw where a girl got handcuffed to one and I was done with pool drains. Don't go near them to this day. I can imagine I am not the only one in our world with such silly fears. I can't imagine some of the real fears some people have in far away, and not so far away places. Like, how are they going to feed their kids with no money left, or what job will they find now that they have been let go, or how in the hell do you adapt to having a terminal disease? Jesus - have mercy on them please. Convert the hearts of our world (mine included) to care for our brothers and sisters better.


Numero dos. The Keith Hernandez episode of Seinfeld is, to me, a classic and a top favorite. I saw a few minutes of it last night before I fell into my beauty sleep. The writers for that show are/were genius. It took a few years, but I am so glad they figured out what to do with Elaine's hair instead of that continual puffy mound at the top of her head. Sometimes situations in my life feel like they could easily be featured on an episode, and I have even heard myself say things to myself, and in my head I sound an awful lot like him. I adore you Jerry Seinfeld. 


Numero tres. News. I have been accustomed to watching Good Morning America in the mornings. I used to think it was beyond cra.zy that adults liked - actually enjoyed watching the news. I have arrived. I look forward to it most mornings. I do feel a bit more eased into adulthood now that I am part of the "news club". I have some news of my own. Nope, not pregnant - didn't win the lotto - don't secretly have a 6th toe on either foot - I am giving my notice at work today. Going to be self employed. A short while ago I felt the prompting, from my God. I try to be obedient when the prompts come - they have always blessed me beyond what I could have planned or dreamed. This time it is ringing true again . . . the footwork has been similar to that scene in Indiana Jones where he takes steps "in faith" and the stones come out just in time on the path for him. It's time. It's time to learn and grow in new situations. I will miss many things about this, the people, the environment but my heart is really excited for the future. Possibly within the year I might have other news - pregancy? Lotto? Definitely not the 6th toe.




Some things that make my heart bubble over today:


*My daughter "sleeping in", so I thought. She was playing and talking in her crib. Enjoying her solitary time. I love my solitary time. She is her mother's daughter.


*Our hallway closet. I am so grateful that this tiny amount of space holds "extras" for us. Toilet paper, toothpaste, toothbrushes, light bulbs, aluminum foil, etc. Thank you for the plentiful stock we have for our needs Lord.


*O, walking around holding my cell phone and babbling up a storm. I have no idea who she thinks she is talking to, but she has great conviction in her voice! My DH says she gets this from me. Again - her mother's daughter. I love her immensely.


*Friends. I would not be who or where I am today with out them. 


*My DH coming home from work this morning. Tired, having worked hard. He comes "home". I love him.


*Coffee. Go-go juice. Liquid energy. Joe. Jahhhhhva. 


* Family. Some are coming over for dinner tonight. I am blessed by them in my life. Some are coming into town late tonight, and we will dine at the good 'ol Organ Stop with them this weekend. Some live here and I am blessed by them as well. I am blessed abundantly. I hope that I mirror that in my life - generosity is something I strive for. It doesn't come natural. 

Filling in the Space

The space between here and there can drive me batty. Loco. Cra.zy. I do better with structure of some sort, free time is challenging. Howevah, if I fill in that space with too much  . . . also crazyville. This past week had a nice balance. The kind of balance where I felt at peace with so many moving parts around me, the moving parts of family life. Projects, things to look forward to, ideas, prayers. These things help me feel as if I am directing the snow ball down the mountain instead of running ahead of it only to be toppled by it's avalanche. I've always been this way. Creating, planning, organizing. Probably why I loved parts of teaching, aside from the kiddos. Well, most of them anyway. There are always a few stinkers in a crowd.

By noon today it felt as if it should have been 8pm. A lot of things were accomplished, even lunch with a treasured friend. (I love you M.S.!) It's now in the 9pm hour . . . O is fast asleep, coffee in the magic maker is set for tomorrow. Pork roast, soon to be chalupa, is crock-potting right now - to be ready for shredding in the morning. Peanut butter gf Rice Krispy treats made and tasted. Let me hear an Amen! They are fab.

What I'd like to accomplish tonight . . .
file a few things
paint my fingernails
magically make the neighborhood dogs silent for the night (ours included)
lose 30 pounds (I'd settle for 1 at this point)
send out a few emails
enjoy a margarita or two, with lots of salt, frozen please
pray
eat
love (sort of hard to do with hubby getting ready to leave for work, if you know what I mean)
watch a good movie


In reality, I'll send out those emails, pray and maybe lose 29.5 pounds.

Tomorrow. T-minus 3 hours and Wednesday will be here. Thyroid check tomorrow. Something is off, looking forward to figuring this out. Perhaps other test results will be in as well? Hope.

My mind is blank. Darnit, if I didn't wish I had a laptop or a mind machine to instantly write my thoughts. . .  I had a handful of things that I was dying to jot down in this very spot, earlier today. I only remember one. I get super giddy about coupons. I have to try really hard to contain my excitement and not just burst out with words of excitement or strange sounds like O makes. Really. I am not kidding. I believe they are a currency, and secretly I might like to roll around (no, not naked) in a huge pile of them. Oooh, just remembered a second one. I made my own croutons. You don't understand the love affair I have with this tiny morsel of food. Crunch factor has ALWAYS been big on my list, hence my addiction to popcorn and potato chips. I'd give the recipe right here if I could remember it. C'mon. I can barely remember what I thought about today. Surprised? There was some gf bread involved with some melted butter, garlic powder, mixed up with some parsley and salt. Oh, I think I tossed in some parmesean cheese too. I don't know how spell parmesean. They are fab too. Amen!

Things I heard today.
My little one toot a few times
Mamma
I need a haircut
Wanna try a cucumber with lemon juice and chili on it - (my response) Um, hell no!
I love you
shambut (Olivia language)
93 for a high today
Thank you for choosing McDonalds today

Drat! Auto Save.

Sure as sh*&. I just published take-2 of today's post and saw that my "draft" of take-1 was auto saved. Oh well, lesson learned.

Grateful today for:
auto save
bagged salad with ziplock
gf mac and cheese
things to look forward to, of which I have a very big one coming up
partial test results from the doctor

Monday Blessings and Tour de Kitchen - Take 2.

I never used to look forward to Mondays, don't know many people who do. I live for them these days. Working Saturdays changes weekends a bit for me. I love it, busiest day in the salon, but I miss having Saturdays off. Sundays for our family are filled with big breakfasts, Church, family time and a few little things. Mondays give me a chance to breath. The house is quiet, not filled with guitar playing or the sound of drumming  echoing from the garage (God bless my stepson). It is my day to throw a hat on, not even attempt make-up and brushing teeth is optional until lunchtime. O and I head out to do groceries sometime after breakfast and a few cups of coffee for me. A few weeks ago my DH suggested that I try shopping at one store only. It might be easier, he thought, than running between 3, sometimes 4 stores chasing the good deals and all coupons worth $1. I was not a believer. I am now a convert after doing it 3 weeks in a row. This particular store, to remain nameless, 'cuz I bet you WON'T guess which one it is, I really don't like supporting. Convenience and low prices win this one. I love that it is easy to get EVERYTHING in one store. Feminine products, butter, mascara, air filters, fresh veggies. Ahhhhh. Chalk one up for my DH. I love you bb.

Where is the blessing in Mondays for me? In the shopping itself, saving money for our family, buying good, wholesome products that will soon be turned into yummy meals. The blessing is then weaved through to the room where that all happens. O usually falls asleep on the way home so I carry her to her crib. All 30 lbs and size 5 diaper of her. She sleeps peacefully and I put away the groceries. I love this time. The doors are open, breeze coming through to wash the overnight air out. The fridge gets cleaned out, tupperware gets a bath and ready for the new ingredients of this week, counter tops get a plentiful cleaning with 409, fresh towels are put out and all is well in the land of perfect. I receive the blessing of time to prepare this sacred space (it is that to me), and become ready to bless, in turn, my family for the week.

Today, when I had finished in said kitchen, I sat down to write this very blog. O woke up with soaked sheets and a diaper 3x it's normal size. Whoops. After, she snuggled on my lap with her milk while I typed with one hand the last few words, getting ready to publish. She wanted to add her own touch - as she often does - by pushing a few letters herself. In a flash. The. Screen. Was. Empty. I have no idea what she pushed, it all happened so fast. So, I'm stealing time while she is awake to get this done, take two. It's only fair. She is amusing herself, running back and forth between the coffee table (which never has coffee on it), and the cabinet next to my chair. She is tagging the cabinet as if to say "I made it!" and then runs back to tag the coffee-less table. Quite funny. Now she is sitting by the open front door, tearing tiny papers into tinier pieces. No doubt, some receipts from my wallet that she always seems to find. Amusing. Adorable.

Now for the Tour de Kitchen . . .after I had everything cleaned and put away, I took notice of how good it all looked and here are a few things that I thought were photo-worthy.

Our Lady of Lourdes guards our faucet and reminds me

that there are greater purposes in doing dishes if I 

choose to be open to them.

This angel, from a collection I have, made her way to the kitchen 

by way of a teeny girl with HUGE brown eyes. She now sits

on our stove next to my fav red tea kettle and watches over the pork

roast I have thawing for tomorrow night's dinner

This poor jar has been empty for over a week. It usually holds a delish blend of cinneman/cinnoman/cinomen and sugar. I'll get around to it I suppose.

I'll bet every mother in America knows what these are. You get them

each time you buy children's medicine. O loves to try to put them together. 

We find them ALL over the house.

Our fridge is decorated with this great toy. Have to say, I have

always dreamed of having my fridge look like this. 

A few letters are missing . . . again we find these ALL over the house.

Our Lady of Good Remedy blesses our kitchen. I am a devout patron.

I would be remiss if I didn't share these . . . 

Pre-marriage decor of my DH. Yep. That is a large wooded fish. 

His counterpart fell behind the stove a few months back. 

Teeny fingers are making their way onto the keyboard. There will not be a take-3 of this post. 

Signing off. 

Blessings to each reader!!

I'm Gettin Lucky Tonight!

Got home from work a short while ago, got to snuggle with O for a few minutes and my DH just made popcorn! Lucky me! (that's all the "luck" that shall be had for tonight!)

I love people. I am an introvert, but I love people. People watching, conversations, life histories(sometimes), congregations, etc. Love them! We had a playdate at the park today. Note to self, when planning to meet others at "the play area" at a ginormous park, check to make sure which one! Of course we ended up at a different one than our playdate people. Thank you K for calling me - you are on it! Below are a few pics from our excursion.

The forbidden fruit, no pun intended.
 The apple belonged to Nicholas but O quickly took it upon herself and ran like the wind.
Does this story sound familiar? Oy Vey!

This was a hot commodity for the teeny people!
 The frizzy hair child at the bottom right would not leave
the car alone for one minute! (she was not one of ours)

Her first time in a tunnel slide. I'd say her going down this about 10 times meant she liked it? 

Mamma and baby ducklings. How fitting as we mammas were with our babies!

This beauty reminded me of me - we are almost twins with the purple in our hair!

My little lovey - squinty face and all!

Nicholas' thumb. A true masterpiece. He was "handing" me back  the camera.

One strange looking bird.

I am always honored by spending time with K - you are one of my fav people. Such balance in the imbalance of life with kids, true physical beauty with hair pulled back and a makeup-less face, Amazing grace in the moving forward of life. I love you!

I am totally excited about something. Almost can't sleep. Not pregnant, though I might like to be soon. Not able to give any stinkin details, bet you are curious. I am curious too, to see God's plan unfold even more than it has in abundant blessing. 

Some things I don't understand these days.

Some people's choices - I'm just sayin . . . wish I could explain the hair colors I witnessed on one lady tonight in the grocery store. Hey - I guess it works for her. 

Why our neighbor has driveway parties on Thursday nights. Seriously.

Where does my husband put the boxes of cereal he eats. I swear he can take one box down in 2 days!

What my daughter is referring to when she says vuck. Neither parent in this house curses (in front of her).

Why on the day when I am the salon go-for walking to get Circle K drinks (getting 5-32oz drinks), they have NO drink carriers. They did have one tiny box that worked.

I'm off to get lucky now - popcorn, here I come!

 

This & That

Seinfeld is on in the background. I have seen this particular episode way too many times. The one where George gets Elaine to take his IQ test for him. Distraction is good at times for me, and that is what it is providing for me at the moment. If the house was all quiet I would fall asleep, there are a few things left to do yet; coffee and water in the pot for tomorrow morning - I love the automatic maker; bless the house, check on O, make sure her one leg is not sticking out between the crib slats like it is during her naps; plug in phone for recharging; finish this blog.

Menu planning is moving ahead. I'm going to try themes. Borrowing it from the LDS Food Nanny. I'm working the Ecumenical angle. I even threw in one of my own, "sandwiches". There are many yummy sandwiches that could be had for dinner - philly cheese steak, BLT's, chicken salad (hello tomorrow night's dinner!) and I'm sure I'll find more recipes soon.

Today was a long day. Aren't most days though when you are a mom/parent? Some days so much happens yet at the end of the day nothing concrete can be remembered as to what actually got done/happened. Sometimes just keeping track of the teeny people is work enough. I think the rocks in our front yard have all been through an extensive turnover. Those from the east side of the yard are now on the west, and vice versa. My teeny one loves to shovel, pick up, toss, carry, and yes even lick the rocks. I keep her out of the area where our 80lb furry child does his "business" - those rocks are disgusting. Sometimes the sidewalk chalk makes it close to her mouth and oops, just brushes the top lip. She thinks she is being sneaky but I'm on to her. We scribble pictures out on the front cement. Priceless works of art. There was a lot of laughing weaved into today. O, me, DH, co-workers and clients laughed and it was nice. The night ended with our daughter running amuck through the house, giggling from deep within at the very thought of being "gotten" by one of her parents. Roaring laughter soon came from all of us. Until. She turned her head to look back at us and. Bonk. Hit her head smack on the entertainment center. Small bump, crocodile (or are they alligator) tears. Goodnight Moon and snuggles calmed us down and with prayers said, blessings given (she is now reaching up to tap-tap-tap our foreheads, her version of the sign of the cross), she fell sweetly to sleep. The noise machine helps, set to waterfall. Thanks Neighbor J!

To have people think you are great is nice.

We have a niece getting married this weekend. This is the first wedding to attend since our wedding a few short years ago. Hmmmm. Memories. I can still go back to that day - being in the room getting ready. Chatting excitedly with my sisters and mom, along with my young niece. That moment of stepping out of the bridal room, walking with my dad to the church entrance - already tearing up. Dad and I. And then, there he was. I couldn't take my eyes off him. Literally. I would have tripped or thrown up or something horrible. I remember feeling bad that I wasn't looking at our guests. I can go back in my mind too, to the day O was born. I miss that time deeply. It was beautiful though it hurt like hell, let's be honest. Stalling at a 5 for over 5 hours was no fun. Epideral worked great. I still can hear O's voice in the meditation I prayed as I was pushing and waiting for contractions. I could hear her sweet girl voice telling me she was almost there. It was a beautiful scene in my heart. I was walking in an open building, lots of windows and lovely sunlight. A slight breeze was blowing and the linen curtains blew around softly. I was so relaxed (in the meditation remember) and I was walking and walking toward her voice. It was as if she was around a corner directing me, encouraging me, beckoning me. It was all so gentle and filled with love. And then. The burning, sharp pains and boom she was out. A full head of hair, looked like she had fingerwaves just styled in. The nurse put her right on my chest and she began to drink. Suuuuuuuch a miracle!

What the vuck?

Yep. My daughter's fourth word sounds a lot like the f-bomb. A few times we have been taken back because it sounded like an "f" instead of a "v". Laughter, good times.

Enjoying some breakfast while sitting outside this morning.
She was talking up a storm - a few "vucks" made their way into the conversation.

Life is moving full steam ahead. Thank you God for another day. Family is terribly important. Whether it's the family we are born/adopted into, or those we choose to be our family later in life. I believe in both, am blessed by both. To see my own dad well up with tears and laughter as my daughter is amusing him with her presence moves my heart. I remember him as a hard worker, beyond long hours serving our family as best he could. Not a lot of play or down time but very well provided for. I see that now with my daughter and him. I know he cherishes it and I see her loving his being amused by her. She squinches up her little nose and eyes and smiles with giggles. Tears in my eyes too. So lovely. Grandma is not to be forgotten either. The tenderness with which she cares for O, talks to her and makes her laugh make my heart bubble over. A glimpse of heaven today as we were leaving Grandma and Pepere's house. O grabbed my hand and Grandma's hand and we took a few steps connected. Grandmemere made a lasting impression today as well - O is her 10th great grandchild but the only one in state. She is an avid card player and O joined her in that today. 52 card pick up was the game of choice, Grandmemere just laughed her hearty laugh. O explored the room in the assisted living space. She found the tiny statue of Jesus and gave Him besos (kisses) and snuggled him, passed him around for us to do the same. Grateful He has a place in her heart already.

Parmesan crusted chicken, sauteed asparagus and jasmine rice for dinner tonight. Trying new recipes and working up to a few nights of planned ahead meals. Good feelings, great meals. Think I'll try a goal of one baked treat a week. Morning Glory muffins were this week's pleasure. All three of us loved them. 

I got some time alone tonight. Thank you DH for supporting me. Thank you for researching for me too on the new technology item I am looking for. You are my expert for knowing the difference between Android, 4G, Smartphones, etc. I do not have this wisdom. In this time alone - I searched for a dress for a family member's wedding this weekend. Whew. Some of the dresses I tried on were too big. I found one that works - A-line dresses work best on this set 'o hips. I also made some phone calls that needed to be made, enjoyed a tasty frosty coffee drink that had 0 calories. If I type that, it must be true right? My hips and I thought it was delish. 

A few things I am in love with today (other than the obvious, Lord, DH, O etc. . . )
parchment paper
asparagus
the word "vuck"
our new diaper bag - really more of a side-worn napsack. Thank you Eddie Bauer
Buy Buy Baby - vucking huge store!
my emerald green toenail polish
my hair - never thought I'd say that! Good product, good weather = great hair day!
vitamin c

Stealing Time

All three members of my family are asleep at this very quiet moment. I would love to be too, but as a working momma - my time alone is precious. I choose to share it with my keyboard for now. Many thoughts have come to mind in the last few days that I would have almost given my right arm to blog about. Obviously I didn't give said arm, as I am able to type just fine.

Easter in the past always felt like a destination to me. The journey was lent - a time for growth, molding and preparation. Good Friday was solemn and filled with religious tradition and incense. Mmmmmm. I have always enjoyed the incense at church.

This time Easter feels like the journey, not sure what or where the destination is. Today feels more like a beginning than anything.

I have been terribly hungry for time alone. Not just simply alone due to proximity of others. Real time alone. Time for my soul to just be. Time for my soul to relax, breath and be still. Starbucks for an hour by myself is tempting though if I could be alone in that place with no thought of another around, no music, no distractions outside the building . . . that would be even better. I'm chasing a pipe dream. I love many things and people in my life. I need time with me. Time to fill my cup as they say. I am an introvert, though I have never worked in a career that supported that. Go figure. I fill up with time by myself. Not days, sometimes not even multiple hours. Just time.

Like many others, I assume, there are a bout 101 things floating around in my head that need to be done. I'll share only a few - clean the bathroom, wash bath toys for O, do load of towels, organize recipe books, organize skinny kitchen cupboard, plan grocery list and menu for next week, check the mail, dust (somehow this always shows up on my lists of things to do, damnit.). On top of a full day already. Oy Veh. I hear myself say that expression as an older Jewish woman might say it with a back east accent. There is some company - having to do with construction I suppose - with the name Asplundh on it. I giggle each time, because again in my head I hear an old Jewish woman saying it with a smokey voice and thick back east accent. "asplunduh". I'm sure that's not how it's pronounced but it's what's in my head.

Tonight feels like a popcorn night. Some sort of movie that can entertain me without causing me to follow along to strictly. The polish on my fingernails must come off - totally chipped and it's red. That takes effort to get the stain off and that's about all I'll have mental energy for by the time I get through the bath and bed routine with my little dumpling.

First ever Easter egg hunt at our house this morning! 4 HUGE plastic eggs filled with goodies for O. She found them no problem, didn't really want to open them . . . just enjoyed shaking them like a maraca because of the sound it made. The bunny ring pop I think, stole the show. Similar to her pappy-pacy-binky-pacifier(choose your favorite), she popped it right into her mouth and sucked away. The drool all over her proved she loved it. Oh so fun. Will add in the golden egg next year with a tiny piece of white cloth and share the story of Jesus' resurrection. A friend many years ago did this as a family tradition and I have been holding it in my heart since then. Looking forward to sharing it with my family.

Just for Today

For today: what I know to be true . . .

Tiny hairs in my bra is no laughing matter. A consequence of my job, yes. Comfortable, nope. 

Waiting for medical test results is not an easy task. 

A squoval tip on my fingernails looks pretty nice these days. (squoval - sort of square, sort of oval)

I don't pray enough.

Lollipops do help teeny tiny people get through haircuts!

For today: what I believe . . .

It is important to love others. 

It is important to know what "to love" really means.

Sometimes Openness is hard.

Desserts made with real butter just taste better.

The rash on O's cheeks is from tomatoes. Darn it. 

I am blessed.

For today: what I wonder about . . .

Why do people in other countries drive on the other side of the road?

If I just started speaking with an accent, what would people do?

Who invented the door latches, toilet latches and other safety items? I'd like to thank them!

Aspects of my life in the future.

How does it make sense that we have starving and homeless people all over our world and yet we pay sports players millions of dollars and spend more millions on movie making. 

How many tears Jesus sheds for those suffering from choices of abortion.

For today: what I pray for . . . 

Myself, and those intentions of depth in my quiet heart.

All those I have promised to pray for, especially those I have forgotten about.

Anyone who is in despair or feels lonely.

Those battling cancer, disease or addiction.

Strengthening of families as they work to image God to our world.

My sisters.

Perspective

I read a story once on those little pocket-sized cards about a man who was weighed down heavily by life. He cried out to God that his cross was too heavy. God told him to take his cross to the cross room, lay it down and pick out another one. The man put his cross in there and looked around, spotted a small cross in the room and chose it. God told him that was actually the cross he brought in.

A dear friend and client was in for some hair pampering tonight and in our conversation I was reminded about perspective. How funny to me that I can get stuck in seeing people's outsides and comparing what my insides feel like, to that. It is important for me to remember that I truly don't know what someone else has gone through/is going through/what cross they are carrying. And vice versa. As much as my life may have uncomfortable things, challenges, struggles, etc. It is my life. If it were meant to be different, it would be. My life also full of blessing, if I choose to stand in awe of them/see them.

Talked to a new friend a few days ago who has a few different belief systems than I do. Interesting. I am able to appreciate her perspective.

My hair is happy today. It's a few days after a cut and color, it has adjusted to the trauma of change. I am happy about my hair today. No more sparkly hairs (gray ones - at least for 3 weeks). My eyebrows - well, that's another story. I need the magic of waxing but have been too busy. While I'm at it, I also need a facial, full massage, pedicure, manicure and a stellar night sleep (thanks for the word M.R!). What I'll actually get is my fav Mary Kay face mask and a toner, rolling around on a tennis ball to break tension knots in my shoulders, painted toe nails and fingernails, and an ok night's sleep.

Grief. Not just the grief I felt while my daughter was pushing the dog's water bowl around the kitchen and having it spill everywhere while I was ferociously getting dinner ready. She then sat in the water and just played with a cup in the bowl. I decided in the moment to let it go and just get dinner done. She was having a moment of fun and it was only water. Rather, I mean grief as in the passing of something and the emotion that goes with it. On our way back from Bisbee we stopped to get O some dinner (before the crazy hour before bath time began). We were about 45 minutes from home. This place reminded me of someone I never got to say goodbye to. Someone who I cherished for a few reasons. I had a moment to think of this person, imagine some sort of goodbye and lay the grief to rest. It was surreal,  I feel better.

Apple Crisp. The house had such a wonderful fragrance last night as it bubbled and cooked. O had unplugged the cable connection. I thought the cable was out, turns out "sticky fingers Olivia" was at it again . . . getting in to things I don't think about. I baked, painted my nails (both sets) and read. It was a nice evening. Though - I gave up t.v during the day for lent, so I really was looking forward to some veg time with the tube before bed. My soul is probably better for it.

I am dizzy. I am tired. I am heading for the apple crisp!

Home

My daughter is currently working her "See and Say" toy like a slot machine in Vegas. I giggle as I am so aware of her playfulness and energy. She has never been to Vegas. The sun is just coming up and the neighborhood is quiet. I look forward to the day when we can live in a neighborhood without as many dogs who bark pretty much all day long. I am a cat person.

Many times I have heard it said (by moms) that "vacations" are just working trips. I'm in full agreement there. We went to Bisbee  Busybee for a short staycation. The town was so charming aside from all the steep hills and stairs while carrying a 28 lb 14 mo old. Surprisingly there was a lot to see and do which kept us busy - and someday we will return to do what was left unseen/undone on this trip. Including but not limited to the sleep we did not get. The place we stayed was amazing. O had so much room and 3 steps to run amuck and play on the whole time. We traveled and played hard the first day - she was too busy and teething too much to eat well during the day. She pretty much ate 1/2 of both DH and my dinner (enchiladas, tacos, beans & rice). Inhaled was more like it. I didn't care how dirty she got while eating - as long as her tummy got full! 

When bedtime came, and I use that term loosely, I figured there would be some challenge as O has not sleep well in new places. In the end the three of us attempted rest in the Queen size bed. Surprisingly, no black eyes or bruised ribs occurred. Felt like I had  _____ this much room in the bed and got __ this much sleep. Oh well, thank God for coffee in the morning

Learn as you go, little by slow a good friend tells me often. I learned this weekend that I needed extra-extra clothes for O. She pretty much peed through her diaper in each outfit at one point. I am a little obsessive about her not being in a wet diaper for too long, so I find myself changing them often. Perhaps she was drinking more since the weather was dry, windy and warm? Oy Vey!

Ahhhhhh, the coming home after being away feeling. I love it. I love getting the dirty laundry clean, putting away my toothbrush and settling back into routine. I don't so much like the feeling of having missed a day in my week so things are already piling up for today. I will keep mindful today of what is truly impot54tyant (important). A little brown haired girl is helping me type for the moment. I will also not try to be super mom, not pack my day too tight or overlook time to just be silly with O. What I will do today is - clip O's nails. They are beginning to look like a Guiness Book of World Records experiment. I will do groceries with a new strategy and budget as DH and I talked about on the travel home yesterday. I will call the restaurant in Bisbee that charged us twice for the same meal. I will get a few errands done, and make time to pray. 

I have a lofty goal, at least is seems this way to me. I can't quite figure out why it has been such a challenge so far. Mom used to post the week's menu on the fridge each week when we were little - she shopped according to that menu and prepared good meals. That posted menu though, also helped me figure out which nights I might want to be at a friend's house for dinner! Lol. I was/am a picky eater as a kid/adult. Why is this so hard for me with my family? I have no freakin idea. Maybe this week I will become one step closer to planning better for the meals I will cook? I don't think it's rocket science, after all. 

My DH before climbing 180 steps

Heading into the mine for a tour

A miner and his daughter

A cool piece of history in Tombstone